Can t help falling in love with you
by PrincesseSophie
Summary: what will happen when his last victim turns out to be his first love?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 can´t help

**Hey, this is my first fan fic, i made the mistake of putting it all in one HUGE chapter :S, sorry for that but here it is, please review!**

**I do not own Silas or the Da Vinci Code, I only take credit for the girl**

Can´t help falling in love with you.

SILAS POV

I got off my black Audi and walked towards the big, medieval Cathedral of Notre Dame in the middle of the night where Bishop Aringarosa was waiting for me.

-I have a very important mission for you, Silas.

-I will do anything you say, Father.

-The world is turning into a catastrophe because of the lack of believers, heretics, they are taking over it, and my precious Spain is in danger because of… her…

He handed me a picture of a young girl, like seventeen years old, a very light tan skin tone, long light brown hair, and blue eyes, sitting in a rose garden. I looked at Bishop Aringarosa clueless.

-Mar Cortés, childish girl from Barcelona protesting against the Catholic Church and the Opus Dei ,accusing us for God knows what and causing rebellions in Spain, being an absolute threaten.. She may be young, but very dangerous, since she knows too much.

-of course, so what´s my mission?

I started to feel really angry. Who does she think she is? She is just a child, she knows nothing!

she will be coming to Paris next week to investigate more and get on with her reckless purposes, you will go to where she is and kill her, I want her dead.

I will, Father

I drove back to my apartment, I had a session with the Discipline as usual, had a glass of water, prayed and went to bed. The day when I was supposed to meet her came, I went to a narrow street and saw a girl coming out of a small library, wearing a blue skirt, a white T-shirt and a bag, I recognized from the picture it was _her, _I came from behind and hit her in the head, she fell to the floor unconscious. I took out my gun and was about to shoot her, but something stopped me, it was some very strong force , stronger than Bishop Aringarosa´s orders, stronger than my will to kill, her light brown hair shined with the moonlight, she looked so pure, like Virgin Mary, something was wrong, my heart was beating really fast and I forgot I was wearing the cilice as I watched her beautifully laying with her eyes closed. I couldn´t kill her, she was too worthy for that.

Oh Jesus! What is Bishop Aringarosa going to say now? He is not going to say anything, because he is not going to find out I didn´t kill her. I carried her light body to the car and took her to my apartment. I laid her on my bed and started thinking: "what happened? I´ve killed people before, I killed my own father, four guardians of the Holly Grail, and a nun. Why was it different this time?"

MAR POV

I woke up in a room I´d never seen before, it had no TV or any modernity signs, just a bed and a night table, it was dark and scary, there were crosses hung all over the wall, I felt I was in an Inquisition Museum, but it felt more real. I heard some loud noises from outside mixed with human sounds. At the beginning I thought someone was having an orgasm, but after a few seconds I dared to go out and I´ll never forget what I saw_, he _was completely naked, pale white skinned and haired (clearly an albino), standing towards the wall, flogging himself! I was petrified as I saw the blood coming down his back. He sensed me and turned around to face me. And that was it. I saw that part of him I definitely didn´t want to see. I ran back to the room and locked myself for another three hours until I heard him knocking at the door, but I didn´t answer, he knocked again, and again I didn´t do anything, he got desperate and kicked the door down.. He put some bread and a glass of water on the night table. OH, how nice! I was in a fetal position, completely traumatized and he tried to reach out to me, I could notice he was unsure about what he was doing, he stopped and left, I stayed there for a few more minutes and ate the bread, I had no idea of where I was, or why, I got enough courage to go out again and saw him now dressed (fortunately), sitting beside the wall reading what I suppose was the Bible, now I could talk to him for the first time and asked the first question which came to my mind.

-Who are you?

-I am the messenger of God-he answered after hesitating about whether to talk to me or not.

-the…what?

-I am the messenger of God.

-Whooo arrre youuuuu?

-I am the messenger…

-Who the FUCK are you?

-Silas.-he finally said with a surprised expression on his face, I think it was because I used the "F" word.

-Silas, unusual name, anyway, why am I here?

- (1 Samuel 15:23) "For rebellion is as the sin of divination, and presumption is as iniquity and idolatry. Because you have rejected the word of the Lord, he has also rejected you from being king."

-Is that so? Just because I don´t let you people brain- wash me? Just because I don´t believe in anything? Because you are afraid I wanna make a change.

He didn´t answer, I screamed "DAMN IT!" and went to get my bag, and see what I had, just a couple of books, lipgloss (naturally!), my passport and airplane tickets, a pencil, a drawing sketch, and….MY IPHONE! Awesome, no credit, I didn´t know what to do now, I was kidnapped, scared, and lonely. I had heard cruel stories about kidnapping and the Church, he could rape me and kill me at any moment, or sell me somewhere else to be abused, like I was some kind of object instead of a person.

He didn´t talk to me for the rest of the evening, then he gave me a pillow and a sheet so I could sleep on the floor of the living room (IF you can call it a living room since it had nothing, not even a couch), it was hard for me to fall asleep that night but I managed to, I woke up the next day and he was already up, in the tiny kitchen, I got up and approached him and he says:

-Are you hungry?

-A little- I answered shyly.

He didn´t look at me but ordered: "Sit down".

I obeyed and he put a croissant on the table, very good by the way. Later I was wondering what to do so I didn´t get bored and I found in my bag "The Phantom of the Opera" I love that story so much I began to read it, when I got sick of reading I played "Tap. Tap" on my Iphone wishing I could call for help, and since the monk had no Internet I couldn´t send an e-mail, great, I couldn´t stand one day without going out, and now I didn´t know how many days I would be locked in that empty apartment. Some days went by, and I tried to see the positive side, if there is one, I wouldn´t go to school, I was on winter holidays, lovely.


	2. Chapter 2 can t help

Chapter 2 can´t help

SILAS POV

So I was having a teenage girl in my house, kidnapped, for God knows how long and I had no idea of what to do with her, each moment was completely awkward. Women are sinners, they are disciples of the devil, they will try to seduce me and tempt me to sin, I always knew that, just like Eve had tempted Adam, I was a server of the Church I was clean of all sins of the sort.

On the 5th day I was reading my Bible when I felt her standing right in front of me, I made the terrible mistake of leaving the Bible to look at her, her legs were so well shaped, and that light touch of sunlight on her skin, some color I would never have, my wide-opened eyes couldn´t stop staring at them, then I looked upwards and upwards following each part of her body until I met her gaze, she looked scared and angry at the same time, God! What have I done, I felt so embarrassed so I pretended nothing had happened and went back to reading, she took one step back and left. I was such a hypocrite sinner. I felt ashamed and sick.

**MAR POV**

I started to read "Like Water for Chocolate", full of passion and… lust.. Silas had stared at my legs, I thought he was just a manipulated monk, but there was something else happening. I know I ran and I was supposedly "mad", but I wasn´t angry at all, actually I was starting to feel something too. And why would I have a crush on a crazy albino monk? I had no idea, he wasn´t flogging himself so often anymore, I took it as a favor because of how I had reacted the last time, but now I was starting to see his muscles, and his perfectly worked out abdomen, his mean face, how could a MONK be so handsome, his eyes and hair made him look like an angel, so thinking clearly, he wans´t ugly!

It had already been a week and I was as dirty as a pig, I felt so smelly, ew! He went out to get some food and I took advantage of it to take a shower, I put some music in my Iphone and sang out loud " My Heart Will Go On", I knew I sang pretty well, it felt so good to finally wash myself…

SILAS POV

I got home and left the bags in the kitchen, then I heard an angelical voice singing, vapor started coming out of the bathroom reaching my skin, it smelled like lavender, I turned around, the door was open, and I could see her siluette! She had such a beautiful body, the upper part of the curtains was transparent so I could see her face and chest. I stood there like a fool for a minute and she didn´t see me, I know it´s sick but I didn´t have bad violent intentions, and who was I kidding? I was enjoying the moment very much, I managed to walk away and laid on my bed hopeless, after some minutes she came in and gasped.

-how long have you been here?

-ehmmm-I tried to sound as calm as possible- not so long…

-did you see me?

-see you where?

-ehh, there…

She was nervous, how cuutee!

-no, I didn´t-I lied, if I told the truth she would never want to see me again.

She seemed more calmed now, she sat beside me and started reading a book she´d taken out of her bag.

After reading some pages she closed the book sharply and asked with a demanding voice: "how long will I be here?" I did not know what to answer, I never thought of that, all I could say was: "As long as necessary."

-you, mean, when I become a devoted catholic.

-maybe…

-ash

And she went on reading.

MAR POV

Who does he think he is to take my freedom? Well, I have to admit he was handsome so it was like "I want to kick your butt but I have a crush on you." But still, I was getting really desperate. Then out of curiosity he asks: "What is that book you are reading?"

-eh, the Phantom of the Opera

-What´s that about?

-it´s about a man who was born deformed and was rejected by his parents, then he goes to live to the Opera House in Paris and he grows up, becoming the composer of the operas, nobody ever saw him, but they could feel his presence, that is why he was "a ghost", he falls so badly in love with Christine, a ballerina and soprano of the Opera House, but this love turns into an obsession and he wants to force her to marry him even if she loved the Vicomte de Changy, she gives him a kiss with such magic that he lets her free, but stays alone for the rest of his life, loving her..

He looked puzzled. He didn´t say anything, but he did look quite uncomfortable I could say. What had happened to the innocent albino that turned him into the crazy albino monk? Too bad there was no Christine in this story I tried to break the silence:

- It´s a book, a movie, and a very successful Broadway musical…

Nothing, he was lost, poor Silas, honestly, I started to feel sympathy even if I didn´t know anything about him, but I wanted to know, that was gonna be hard. We ate together, we sat together, we started to talk more, we didn´t sleep together that´s for sure! I slept in the "living room". But I didn´t feel any bad intentions of him anymore, it was weird but beautiful.

-where are you from?-I randomly asked one day.

-I was born and raised in Marseille, but then I lived and was ordered in Oviedo, Spain, and then in NYC, and now I live in Paris.

-Wasn´t New York too modern for you?, I don´t mean to be rude but you seem a little old-fashioned, not exactly the good way, I mean, no offense…-I was screwing it up, great.

- Fashion does not matter, God is everywhere.

-interesting…-I couldn´t ask further questions, he is impossible.


	3. Chapter 3 can t help

Chapter 3 can´t help

SILAS POV

I had asked about her book because I had hardly ever read anything but the Bible, The Way, or any other book Bishop Aringarosa gave me for my ordination, but when she told me the story I was so surprised to see I was not the only one,_ he _was deformed, I was an albino, he was left for other man, I never allow myself to feel anything like that, he found shelter and a purpose in the Opera House, I found it in the Church, but we were both rejected by the world and were both ghosts. I was starting to hesitate a lot about whether to be "friends" with her or not, on one side I thought: "if I did not kill her, what else do I have left?" Her family would start looking for her and she would son be released or Aringarosa would kill her himself, just the thought of it scared the hell out of me (yes, THE HELL), Christmas was coming and I was used to spend it on my own, praying, but apparently this year I was having company, I sort of knew how other people celebrated Christmas, dinner, presents and I do not know why but it had something to do with some big, fat old-man. I wanted to buy her a present, silly I know, but I did not want to spoil her Christmas either.

Buying a present was the most embarrassing experience ever!

I went out, and saw in Les Champs Eliseés a lot of stores, but I didn´t know what to get her, then I see this store full of dresses, it would be very nice to get her one of those, I entered and the sales lady approached me and asked:

- may I help you sir?

-I wasn´t used to talk to people "the normal way", but I managed to say: I want a dress.

-OK, obviously, for a prom, for a cocktail, for a ball?

- for a girl

She tried to stay calm.

-OK, long, short, V necked, ball gown, bouffant gown, empire cut…

She saw my face and my monk robe and understood why I had absolutely no idea of what she was talking about. She said:

-any color you would like?

That I knew, pure, like i´d seen her that night

-white

-good sir, how is she, tall, short, skinny, fat, curvy, busty?

"beautiful" I thought remembering her siluette through the curtains of my shower, I forced myself to stop and awkwardly said:

she´s like…this…tall-putting my hand at the level of my shoulder- and skinny, seventeen years old, fits…here

-I think I have the perfect one for her, wait here sir.

She left and I was standing alone in the middle of the store, girls all excited trying on stuff with friends, mothers checking every detail, two women that looked more like men fighting for a pink dress…people stared at me with a strange look on their faces, I was used to people feeling uncomfortable around me, it´s not like you see an ugly albino monk in a dress store everyday, Mar would have to pay for this someday. The lady came back with a white dress which shined like the stars, the color and texture were nice, but it did not cover the shoulders and upper chest.

-too much skin- I said.

She was about to laugh out loud but she controlled herself and said in a polite way:

it´s not badly seen, it´s actually what girls wear nowadays.

Eh...OK?

Fine so you are taking it?

Yes, please.

I´m sure your niece will like it very much.

Yes, she will- I understood why she thought she was my niece.

She is going attract so many handsome guys in this dress.

(Oh lady, please shut up!)

-maybe…

I got home with the huge gift bag and when she saw it she got excited and asked:

-you went shoooppiiing? What is it, what is it?

-none of your business-I said sharply to distract her.

After 2 days, it was not yet Christmas but it was time for presents I handed the bag to her and said: well, Merry Christmas.

I loved her expression at that moment, she just couldn´t believe i´d bought her a Christmas present although she didn´t even believe in God. And when she saw the dress she was fascinated. She screamed "THANK YOUUUUU!" and then she jumped from her sitting spot and gave me a hug! So the terrible experience at the dress store had been worth it in the end. Of course I lightly hugged her back, feeling afterwards like a traitor falling into a deadly sin. Then she starts dancing around the room and singing something like "On first day of Christmas my true love gave to me…", I was paralyzed, like her when she realized what she was accidentally singing.

The worst part was that I liked her! I was a monk and she was my rival, for over 10 years I had avoided any sexual attraction, I would automatically flex my thigh so that the cilice would cut into my flesh, but with her I forgot I was wearing it in the first place, I found peace in her, she was my sweet drug. But I couldn´t quit to the Church, and even if I wanted to the Church doesn´t let you go, once you are in, you are in, and she could get killed for that.


	4. Chapter 4 can t help

Chapter 4 can´t help

MAR POV

I definitely loved the dress (and I did NOT mean to sing that, it was just the first thing which came to my mind!) , but why would a crazy monk buy me something? I still remembered the time he was staring at my legs, the only type of men I was used to attract were adult men who saw women as inferior and I could sense their will to rape, they are so sick, but this was a different lust which I could not explain, I just did not feel it the same way. I felt a little guilty on the other side because I mean, he was a monk, and I an atheist girl, he could not be on a relationship, I was afraid that he might get some kind of dishonor for that, I knew some terrible stories about the Church.

-I am glad you liked the dress- he says shyly while eating. How cuuteeee!

-I loved it thank you, why such a detail though?

He stopped eating and didn´t know what to answer.

-ehm…I just thought I could…make you…less depressed?

-that is very kind of you, Silas.-I answered with sympathy.

He was about to have a drink but he looked up and smiled. He smiled!

After a few minutes he asked:

Did you always live in Barcelona?

Yes, I have been studying abroad though.

Alone?

Yes, I don´t mind being alone, I guess I am like my kidnapper in that kind of way.- I said raising one eyebrow ironically.

He smiled again surprised.

-Your parents must be worried about you.-he said guiltily.

- They do not know I am kidnapped, I am supposed to be on a trip to France.

- Do you miss them?

-I know I am going back, and I have a picture of them on my Iphone.

I showed him the picture of them, they looked so happy, at first he seemed commoved, but then said:

-Do you mind if I ask why they´re black?

- They adopted me and gave me a home, when I was 5 after my mother was killed in a car accident, I was with her but survived, and my drunk father later disappeared.

He seemed extremely uneasy.

-it´s OK, being adopted is not bad, if your own parents cannot give you a home, let others have the opportunity, it all depends on how you take it you know.

He stood up quickly and left. What did I do now?

**SILAS POV**

I really needed some air, and be alone to think, she could not find out I had been though the same and I had killed my own father. I went to a church nearby and prayed ´till I cried, I stayed there for a while, I wasn´t ready to go back yet so I got to know the city, I hadn ´t really took time to watch it because I was so busy doing my job, there were so many things, its unique picturesque style, beautiful cafés, souvenir shops everywhere, tourists with t-shirts that read "I love Paris", couples kissing at the Eiffel tower, Mar and I were two people with a similar past, but followed different paths, different lifestyles, beliefs, however we had been joined together by destiny, and I had no idea of what to do. I never realized it was such a romantic city ´till now. I got back home and Mar was taking a nap, she looked so peaceful, I felt the same way I had felt when I was about to kill her, I instinctively laid beside her and started caressing her face.

I had been receiving several calls from bishop Aringarosa but I could not answer, I started thinking about terrible things, Mar being judged for a heretic and a whore, then killed, and me having to do a painful penitence. And they were right, what does a 30-year old man or monk has to be doing with a 17-year old girl? It is incredible that after all the sexual horrors I had endured during prison I still felt lust. What was happening to my celibacy? Besides she was so strong and kind I could say, she deserved someone better than the crazy ugly albino monk.


	5. Chapter 5 can t help

Chapter 5 can´t help

MAR POV

I woke up and he was reading, I bet he already knows the Bible by heart, and I felt really bad for telling him about my past but it´s just that I never hid it and I didn´t feel ashamed of it.

- I am so sorry if I ever made you feel uncomfortable by talking to you about my life, I guess it was not something you needed to know.

He didn´t say anything but he looked with an illuminated expression on his face, it felt…friendly.

Two days later I was reading "Like Water for Chocolate.

-you never get tired of reading do you?- he interrupted.

-no, it broadens my mind, like travelling.

-that is not "The Phantom of the Opera" is it?

-no, this is "Like Water for Chocolate"

-and that is…

-another novel but this one is set during the Mexican Revolution, a young couple is not allowed to get married because she was in a traditional family where the youngest daughter could not marry because she had to look after her strict mother till she dies. This is one of my favorite parts. This girl is talking to her doctor, who is like the angel of the story and he tells her his theory about…love.

-and what is it?- he ask a little skeptically.

We are all born- I started reading- with a box of matches within ourselves, we cannot power them alone, we need oxygen, and the help of a candle. Only in this case the oxygen has to come for example, from the breath of the beloved one, the candle can be any type of food, music, then fire the detonator and well turn on one of the matches. Each person must discover what are their detonators to live. If they are not discovered on time the box of matches is moistened and we will never be able to turn on one single match. Of course, we should be very careful in turning each one of the matches. Because if a very strong emotion comes to power all in one blow to our eyes appears a splendid tunnel that shows us the way that we forget at the time of our birth and calls us to rediscover our "divine origin".

He was now looking at me like saying "And why are you telling me this?" You asked me to, you cute albino monk.

-so, what do you think?- now I felt ready to dare him.

-well, ehm… very interesting yes…whatever

He had a blind faith for his God but he couldn´t believe in love, amazing.

why don´t you believe in God?- he asks.

It is just something you guys invented to rule the world, life hasn´t given me many reasons to, and it´s just impossible that such things exist, they are not logical

Look I am gonna tell you one of my favorite verses of the Bible…

No, not your Bible again!

-So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

-Aha, yeah right.

Ok, he wasn´t that wrong but he was so indoctrinated, that all he could think about were the Bible verses he´d learnt by heart.

**SILAS POV**

A box of matches, light up, love, just a bunch of absurdities, I gave a celibacy vow and I am fine. How can she believe in all that nonsense and not believe in Lord Jesus Christ the Savior? How could she survive the car accident and not believe? I did not feel will to kill her, this time it was different maybe because other time I did not know the victim, and it pleased me to see someone dominated by me after all the humiliation I had suffered, but this girl, I had found peace in her and I knew her, and besides my father I had never killed someone I knew, I found a voice mail in my cell phone from the Bishop, oh Lord! I am dead! I heard it anyway, he said: "Silas. Why have you not answered my phone calls. Answer please! How did everything go? Is she dead? Please return my call Silas. I need to know she is dead and you are alright."

No she was not dead and I certainly was not alright. I fell in love with her. YES I DID! I FELL IN LOVE WITH HER! But I could not let that control me, I had to act at once, or kill her or hide her or what? I really needed to get over it, I was a killer, I was a 30-year old, I was an albino, I was a monk, I had to do something. But all I could think about at the moment was pain, I could not flog myself because she would hear me, so I went to the bathroom, took the cilice and fastened it around my thigh so tightly I ended up laying on the floor with tears coming out my eyes and blood was spread all over my leg. And just to make it worse, two days later I received another voice mail from Aringarosa telling me to get rid of her dead body because the police was already looking for her! Holly Father, save me this time and have mercy for my soul! I suddenly felt a strong will to quit the job, and I mean not only kidnapping her but to quit the Church, or at least my post there, but I had no hope in that possibility. I was so stressed out and I tried to hide it from her, I could not feel anything for a woman, they where all little devils, the obstacles of life. God! Why did I not kill her! I was committing a sin and I was soon to be caught, by the police, by the Bishop, By God and by Mar, and I did not know who scared me the most.


	6. Chapter 6 can t help

Chapter 6 can´t help

MAR POV

I was playing "Tap, Tap" and my IPhone rang miraculously. It raaaannnggg! With my "Right Round" ringtone. With my mother´s ID! "Hello'!" I answered excitedly. I could not speak any longer because someone took it away from my hands.

-what is wrong with you?- I yelled furiously.

- you cannot talk on the phone.

-but hey!

- you should have already gone back to Spain, the police is looking for you right now.- he looked at me with fury.

He was right, I should be in Spain by now, my parents must have been so worried when they didn´t see me at the arrival gate.

-so, you are gonna let me go now?

There was an angry expression on his face. We heard some screams in French saying "armed police!". He grabbed my arm, his gun, and took me out running, I hardly had time to grab my bag. We finally went out of the apartment and for the first time in over two weeks, I could feel the outside air and light.

where are you taking me?

Where they cannot find you!

He was a bit scared I could see, but acted angry.

but why? I need to get home!

NO!

I´d never seen him this altered. I was getting scared, but I wanted to go home, because I was afraid he might kill me. We ran to the back of the building, the police had already broken into the apartment, we were about to escape and Silas stopped frozen at the sight of a man dressed as a priest, Spanish features, standing right in front of us grumpily. He saw me and he was very surprised.

-Silas, I thought she was dead- he said angrily but trying to sound calm.

Silas could not say anything, he was petrified as a rock. At that moment I knew this priest was his "boss", but me, dead?

You wanted to kill me?- I asked scared and a little disappointed.

He looked at me desperate. I could not understand what was happening, I knew he had to kidnap me, but kill me?

-I said wanted this little heretic dead- the priest said.

- Silas, please- I said with pleading eyes.

He looked at me guiltily and was about to say something but the police arrived shouting "armed police! Hands up!", the 3 of us obeyed scared, one of the police officers called me in English to stand next to him and said they were taking me home. Once I was beside the officer I looked at both men, the same policeman ordered Silas in French, to put his gun down, he did so, but I could not help but feel bad, he looked so pressured, which was completely understandable because he was being caught by the police and his boss.

Is this the man who kidnapped you?- the man asked pointing at poor Silas.

Yes, - I said looking at his pale face, it was clearly the priest´s fault, and I wanted to know about Silas, suddenly I came up with an idea- can I say something to you in your ear officer?

Sure

Ask the monk why he wanted to kill me in the first place- I whispered in his ear as he leaned down to hear me.

Ah, right, yes I can do that, you, the monk, why did you want to kill the girl in the first place? Be honest!

At first he did not know how to answer, I guess he could sense the priest ´s presence. But he took courage to my surprise and said:

I was following orders.

From this man?- the officer said pointing at the priest.

Yes- said Silas nervously.

I whispered again in his ear.

- why did he want you to kill her?- he asked.

- she knew a lot about the Church and the Opus Dei, she was a threaten and she was causing rebellions all over Spain.

- is that true?- the officer asked me.

- what?- I said- they have oppressed women so cruelly during centuries! No more! I had to do something, stop this for once and for all, and people supported me despite my young age because they also disagreed, they also were oppressed.

- you are devil!- the priest shouted- you tempted Adam, you caused wars, it is YOU who are the guilty ones for us being sinners!

- that is not true!- I shouted completely angry, I felt so offended when someone said those things- it is because people like you are afraid of actually falling in love and you protect yourselves with sexism!

I should have taken a picture of Silas´s face at that moment, his mouth was literally open, hahahaha, anyway the policemen were all expecting the officer´s orders but he said nothing..

- wait a minute- said I – are you not Bishop Aringarosa? I have seen your pictures. You are very powerful indeed, but you are corrupt and disgusting! Were you not involved in 4 murders?

Yes he was,- the officer said,- he ordered them, the monk did them, they both escaped from the hospital in London and came back to Paris on an Opus Dei airplane. Apparently he orders to kill everyone standing on his way.

So typical of the Church- I said in agreement.

I whispered something else to him.

- are you sure?- he said

- yes

- ok, Silas, why did you become a monk and a killer?

He was frozen, he obviously did not expect the question and I could hear the Bishop telling him in a low voice: "run, Silas, run"

He ran and the police started shooting, "NOOOO!", I yelled horrified, I did not want him dead. At my screams the officer commanded: "Stop!", and so they did, luckily Silas was not hurt.

I know you want to runaway from everything- I said- but please tell me why you became this. Everyone was quiet.

That is none of your business you heretic- the Bishop said.

You stay out of this!- I yelled- it is him who I am talking to, let him speak he has a voice of his own.

Silas was frozen as he had never had the chance to speak for himself.

Well- he started- I have always been a monster, I am ghost.

Who told you that?- I asked with pity.

Everyone- he said and tears started to come out his eyes- my father was a drunk too, he killed my mother because I was an albino, I killed him when I was seven and ran away.

I was horrified, everyone else was shocked.

- it´s ok, go on- I managed to say.

- I was forced to live in the streets, no money, or education, or food, I had to steal, then two drunk sailors where attacking me, I remembered my father and got so mad that I killed one them, the police arrived and sent me to prison, I had a horrible life there, I was beaten up, starved, insulted, and…abused. Then there was an earthquake and I was free, the Bishop found me and took care of me, he guided me and educated me, I became a monk and I followed orders of murder to protect the institution that saved me. I was a ghost Mar, in the streets people see me and point at me saying: "look a ghost". In prison I was the ghost, white, lonely, and ignored. God gave me hope, the Church loved me for who I was, " 'If you can" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes." Mark 9:23.

I was frozen, his story was sad, intense, and yet extraordinary. Everybody, even the officer and Bishop Aringarosa where speechless, poor Silas, he had been hated and then betrayed, but he had still faith, his heart was still kind, he was looking at me hopelessly.


	7. Chapter 7 can t help

Chapter 8 cant´t help

SILAS POV

I started to feel comfortable, I trusted this people, thing I had never done, I had never trusted anyone but the Teacher, and well of course the Bishop, and it seemed like they both betrayed me, I was realizing the challenge that stood before me, I was being reborn again, but this time I had to learn how to trust, I had to go back to my childhood, I had to become a human again. So life was like a series of steps or what? And Mar, I couldn´t deny my feelings for her anymore, it was the first time I fell in love, so I didn´t know what to do, after this she was going back to her family and I would never see her again, all this time I had felt a strong wish to hug her and kiss her, but of course I didn´t know how, or when or how she would take it. When I first saw her and was about to kill her, she gave to me that Virgin Mary air of purity, and now at court, standing up for herself and me, she seemed more like Mary Magdalene to me, and bizarrely I loved both of her facets. At first I thought I was alone in this whole love thing, but she was not accusing me for anything, and was not judging me, she hugged me when I gave her the dress, maybe she liked me, but still, how can someone, a girl, like ME? I still could not get that, but I could ask her later.

- look Judge Moliére,- she suddenly said- I do not mean to be rude or anything but honestly this looks like marriage counseling.

Judge Moliére laughed out loud. Marriage counseling? Me? Since when? I wasn´t planning on marrying her either, such idea had never crossed my mind, and I was a monk anyway, I just wanted to love her, to be with her and share with her every sweet moment of our lives.

Mar could you go out to the cafeteria for a moment while I ask him some private questions? But don´t go to Fache and Aringarosa yet.- said the judge.

Of course- she kindly answered and in two seconds she was out.

So,- she calmly said in French- I know this is the first time you talk to someone like this, so we´ll go slowly. Fache already told me about your life, your confessions when they picked the girl up, but I need to know something else, also very personal, are you ready to answer such a question?

Oh my God, what was she about to ask me?

I do not know what the question is- I answered nervously in French too.

Do you feel some affection for this girl?

Ahhhhh! Was I really ready to answer that? What would happen then? Could I go to jail for this? I definitely didn´t want to end up there again.

I am not sure I can answer that your honor.

Nothing is gonna happen do not worry about that, honestly I think there is nothing wrong, do you want to hear my opinion first?

Yes

I think that celibacy vow you give is completely absurd, you are denying something you cannot avoid as humans and is beautiful, I know that sometimes not loving is the only way you can survive but don´t you rather live a short glorious life than a long one full of hate? Loving is fine, trust me, don´t be afraid of that.

I feel sick.

Why?

I do feel certain attraction for her, but I am a monk!- a shouted desperately at last- I had to kill her, and I do not know what a normal life is and she is just way younger than me!

I understand your emotions, she is a very special girl let me tell you, she is very brave and I feel that you two have very balanced characters, and you belong together.

What should I do then?

Get another job that lets you feel.

You mean, get excommunicated?

It´s just an advice, you don´t have to do it, only if you feel it will let you breathe.

We had a long talk about everything, my life before the church, my life after it, Mar, my feelings for her, this new experience, that I should take it, and more. Then she asked me to go get her! I found her sitting on a table enjoying a huge chocolate bar, she looked so cute, she saw me and gave me an inquisitive look, I didn´t say anything but I moved my head to one side as inviting her in, we sat again on the couch and Judge Moliére said: "well, I guess I´m done with you so we can go out now."

I felt panic, I had changed who I was for a better person in only 2 hours, I should consider going to therapy more often, I was about to face Bishop Aringarosa, who used me to satisfy his greed, Judge Moliére told me that unfortunately I had committed crimes, I had murdered people and kidnapped a girl so I would have to endure prison again, a four- year sentence, but she told that with my previous experience it would no be so bad, and that after that she could help me do a career and get a passport and everything else I needed, that calmed me down, but I wanted to be with Mar, I guess I couldn´t have it all.

We entered the court and Captain Fache was sitting with his head on his hand, extremely bored I can tell, and Bishop Aringarosa was standing near the wall with his arms crossed and very angry, I was getting more and more scared, Judge Moliére dictated her sentence, Bishop Aringarosa was to be excommunicated too and sent to another prison for 5 years, at the end he was really mad and started shouting nasty things at Mar and … me! Then he took out his gun. How on earth didn´t the police take it away? He shot me, I felt the bullet burning my skin and that it would soon reach my heart, then everything went black and the last thing I heard was Mar´s scream of panic.


	8. Chapter 8 can t help

Chapter 8 cant´t help

SILAS POV

I started to feel comfortable, I trusted this people, thing I had never done, I had never trusted anyone but the Teacher, and well of course the Bishop, and it seemed like they both betrayed me, I was realizing the challenge that stood before me, I was being reborn again, but this time I had to learn how to trust, I had to go back to my childhood, I had to become a human again. So life was like a series of steps or what? And Mar, I couldn´t deny my feelings for her anymore, it was the first time I fell in love, so I didn´t know what to do, after this she was going back to her family and I would never see her again, all this time I had felt a strong wish to hug her and kiss her, but of course I didn´t know how, or when or how she would take it. When I first saw her and was about to kill her, she gave to me that Virgin Mary air of purity, and now at court, standing up for herself and me, she seemed more like Mary Magdalene to me, and bizarrely I loved both of her facets. At first I thought I was alone in this whole love thing, but she was not accusing me for anything, and was not judging me, she hugged me when I gave her the dress, maybe she liked me, but still, how can someone, a girl, like ME? I still could not get that, but I could ask her later.

- look Judge Moliére,- she suddenly said- I do not mean to be rude or anything but honestly this looks like marriage counseling.

Judge Moliére laughed out loud. Marriage counseling? Me? Since when? I wasn´t planning on marrying her either, such idea had never crossed my mind, and I was a monk anyway, I just wanted to love her, to be with her and share with her every sweet moment of our lives.

Mar could you go out to the cafeteria for a moment while I ask him some private questions? But don´t go to Fache and Aringarosa yet.- said the judge.

Of course- she kindly answered and in two seconds she was out.

So,- she calmly said in French- I know this is the first time you talk to someone like this, so we´ll go slowly. Fache already told me about your life, your confessions when they picked the girl up, but I need to know something else, also very personal, are you ready to answer such a question?

Oh my God, what was she about to ask me?

I do not know what the question is- I answered nervously in French too.

Do you feel some affection for this girl?

Ahhhhh! Was I really ready to answer that? What would happen then? Could I go to jail for this? I definitely didn´t want to end up there again.

I am not sure I can answer that your honor.

Nothing is gonna happen do not worry about that, honestly I think there is nothing wrong, do you want to hear my opinion first?

Yes

I think that celibacy vow you give is completely absurd, you are denying something you cannot avoid as humans and is beautiful, I know that sometimes not loving is the only way you can survive but don´t you rather live a short glorious life than a long one full of hate? Loving is fine, trust me, don´t be afraid of that.

I feel sick.

Why?

I do feel certain attraction for her, but I am a monk!- a shouted desperately at last- I had to kill her, and I do not know what a normal life is and she is just way younger than me!

I understand your emotions, she is a very special girl let me tell you, she is very brave and I feel that you two have very balanced characters, and you belong together.

What should I do then?

Get another job that lets you feel.

You mean, get excommunicated?

It´s just an advice, you don´t have to do it, only if you feel it will let you breathe.

We had a long talk about everything, my life before the church, my life after it, Mar, my feelings for her, this new experience, that I should take it, and more. Then she asked me to go get her! I found her sitting on a table enjoying a huge chocolate bar, she looked so cute, she saw me and gave me an inquisitive look, I didn´t say anything but I moved my head to one side as inviting her in, we sat again on the couch and Judge Moliére said: "well, I guess I´m done with you so we can go out now."

I felt panic, I had changed who I was for a better person in only 2 hours, I should consider going to therapy more often, I was about to face Bishop Aringarosa, who used me to satisfy his greed, Judge Moliére told me that unfortunately I had committed crimes, I had murdered people and kidnapped a girl so I would have to endure prison again, a four- year sentence, but she told that with my previous experience it would no be so bad, and that after that she could help me do a career and get a passport and everything else I needed, that calmed me down, but I wanted to be with Mar, I guess I couldn´t have it all.

We entered the court and Captain Fache was sitting with his head on his hand, extremely bored I can tell, and Bishop Aringarosa was standing near the wall with his arms crossed and very angry, I was getting more and more scared, Judge Moliére dictated her sentence, Bishop Aringarosa was to be excommunicated too and sent to another prison for 5 years, at the end he was really mad and started shouting nasty things at Mar and … me! Then he took out his gun. How on earth didn´t the police take it away? He shot me, I felt the bullet burning my skin and that it would soon reach my heart, then everything went black and the last thing I heard was Mar´s scream of panic.


	9. Chapter 9 can t help

Chapter 9 can´t help

MAR POV

I couldn´t believe it. I couldn´t believe it! He shot him! That idiot shot Silas! I was so shocked I didn´t realized when just at that moment Captain Fache got me on the car and took me first to my hotel to pick up my suitcases and then to the airport and that´s when I started crying like a baby, Captain Fache had no idea of what to do, he didn´t understand why I was crying, it was a hard flight, I got of the plane and saw my parents waiting for me. My dear family! They received me with the biggest hug i´d ever been received with. At home they bombarded me with all types of questions: who was the monster? did he hurt you? Why? I couldn´t answer anything, but I was thinking "he didn ´t hurt me! He was a charming man! I love him! Am I sick? Is this some sort of mental disease to fall in love with your kidnapper? What if the kidnapper is different and feels the same way about you?" I wanted to ask someone all of this questions? What had Silas and Judge Moliére been talking about?

- listen dear- my mother began- don ´t worry, you are here and safe with us, now you need to relax and for that we got you a surprise homecoming present!

Oh my lovely mother!

what is it ?

two tickets for that Christmas concert in Athens you´ve been waiting for all year!

Oh my god!- I was recovering part of my happiness with excitement.- thank you so much!

Right. I had forgotten that my foster parents had some money. I went to my room which I missed, and got out that dress. It was so pretty, it shined liked the stars and its light color was peaceful and matched with my light tan skin tone and my eyes. I laid in my bed hugging it and started crying over Silas again, I remembered everything we had lived together , all the talking, the awkwardness of when it was silent, his body (I saw it when he was having his whip- appointment), his smile, his eyes, his incredibly white skin… I was really hoping that idiot Aringarosa was already burning in hell. Then I saw the tickets my mother had just given me and started looking forward to this concert. I had seen the advertisement on the internet in January, the Black Eyed Peas, Coldplay, Elton John, Miley Cyrus, Alicia Keys, Mandy Moore, Celine Dion, David Bisbal, Josh Groban, and many other great artists, I ´d never been to Athens before and I was dying to se the Acropolis, I wanted to do something special for Christmas and it looked like it as gonna have a beautiful atmosphere.


	10. Chapter 10 can t help

Chapter 10 can´t help

SILAS POV

I was walking through the streets of Paris, the city I knew best, and yet, I felt completely lost. Thanks to that asshole Aringarosa I lost Mar and my reason for the pursuit of happiness. As I quit the church I realized I had ability for cooking, so I got a job in a small typical French Café and I would start next year, that was in almost a month, I would never kill someone again, I really wanted to put that in the past. I turn around and saw two familiar faces sitting together on a table. Robert Langdon and Sophie Neveu! They recognized me too and were shocked, specially because I was wearing… well, jeans, sneakers, and a polo t- shirt. Without even thinking about it I approached them to say hi like they were old friends, that´s when I realized it had been 5 years.

- bonjour- I said shyly.

- oh my god! Hi!- reacted Robert. Sophie was staring at me with both hate and surprise, I don´t blame her.

- how are you guys doing?

- fine…

- we found each other again in Italy, got married, and we are expecting a baby in May- interrupted Sophie.

-congratulations.- I said smiling.

I felt happy for them, a new human to the holly bloodline, nice.

- it´s so shocking to see you again- said Robert friendly.

- but it´s pleasant to see you… so different- continued Sophie.

- merci- I felt so flattered by the words "so different".

- so what´s new with you?- asked Robert- what caused such a change?

God! How to begin?

can I trust you?

Sure

Well I just quit the church…

Why?- they both exclaimed.

Well I had a mission and I didn´t accomplish it, because I realized how limited I was being, and Bishop Aringarosa is in trouble

I hate that guy!- said Sophie.

What was that mission?- asked Robert.

I had to kill this girl, a protestant against the church and I did not

But you´ve killed people before- said Sophie a little sharply.

I know, I´m sorry

What happened?- asked Robert.

I just couldn´t kill her!

Wait a minute, you liked her?- asked Sophie a little sarcastically.

No, I fell in love with her. -Now they were beyond shocked, they were astonished.

Tell me every detail- demanded Sophie.

I told them the whole story, when I met her, her staying at my place, when the police found us, at court, Judge Moliére, Bishop Aringarosa, my feelings for her, my feelings now, etc.

- aaaawwww!- Sophie cried out, since when was she so sensitive? Pregnancy was certainly having some effect on her.

- yeah well, I am never gonna see her again and she must think I´m dead

- then go get her!- exclaimed Robert.

- how?

- you take a fucking airplane and get to wherever she is!- shouted Sophie, her husband´s face was just something I had to laugh at.

- she must be so happy and safe with her family, what if she doesn´t want to see me?

- you said she thinks you´re dead, if you didn´t hurt her or anything she would have to be very cold if she doesn´t care at least if you´re alive.- answered Robert.

- I guess

- now, changing the subject, did you know about the concert that´s about to take place in Athens?

- eh, no?

- it´s just gonna be the greatest concert ever! It´s for Christmas, you should go if you don´t have anything to do on Christmas Eve, Robert and I are going to Greece to work on both symology and cryptography and on they way we ´ll go to the concert.-said Sophie very excited.

- sounds nice, I´ll think about it.

It was so nice talking to them this way, perhaps I should go to that concert to get away before I start working.

I arrived at Athens and I was impressed, I ´d never seen such a beautiful and historical city, for 3 days y tasted the best food, and visited as many ruins as possible, well, I wasn´t quite used to see so many sculptures of sexy naked women. The day of the concert arrived, it was right underneath the Acropolis and it was soooo crowded, I was surrounded by people like I´ d never been before, it was like 11.00 pm, and the Acropolis was all illuminated and the sky was just… inspiring. I could even feel it in the atmosphere, people from all over the world, speaking different languages, and everyone was hopeful, and for some reason we were all gathered her on Christmas to listen to the most popular music.

As the concert started, everybody started screaming, first song, Viva la Vida by Coldplay, I knew those guys because Mar would play them on her Iphone, the rest of the artists I knew because a man would come out and name them before they made their appearance, next was Miley Cyrus with a new version of "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun", I saw Robert and Sophie, she was dancing wildly like a teenage girl and poor Robert was scared trying to convince her that she was pregnant. The famous Celine Dion came out singing what I recognized as the song Mar was singing at my shower, followed by Alicia Keys with "No One", and then the song apparently everyone was expecting, it was something Mar liked to play on her IPhone as well, "I Gotta Feeling" by some guys called the Black Eyed Peas, I spotted a girl dancing all excited some hip- hop choreography. MAR! She was there! How? And everyone just started dancing too, even me, clumsily of course, they a started walking through people and towards her.


	11. Chapter 11 can t help

Chapter 11

I was standing next to her just when the song ended. Then Josh Groban started singing "_don´t give up, you are loved", _I looked at her face and she was as beautiful as ever, I think she was already 18 and she really looked like a woman, her blue eyes were sparkling and... She was wearing the dress! It fit her perfectly and I just loved her in it. I repeated in my head "turn around sweetie, look at me". To my surprise she did after a few seconds.

Her face was enlightened. I was so glad to see that she missed me. We stared into each other´s eyes for a few moments and she was the first one to speak:

Silas- was all she said looking at me like I was an angel.

Hey- was all I managed to say too.

But how?... I mean, you died, I saw him shooting you.

Looks like I couldn´t leave you.

You´re a miracle, you survived and you ´re here!

No Mar, YOU are my miracle and you are the one who looks like an angel tonight, in that dress.

Thank you. And you... wait a minute. You ´re wearing jeans! And a sweater! Thank God!

Now you believe in God?- I laughed.

Whoever gave those clothes to you is God- she laughed as well.- you look like the cover of a catalogue for men´s clothes. But what happened to your robes?

Oh yeah, you must know I have quit. And I have become a chef.

That ´s wonderful! But are you happy?

Oh yes- after hesitating for a moment I bravely said- but, all I need to be truly happy is you Mar.

Her eyes nearly melted as she said: " I love you Silas". "I love you too".

And then I walked closer to her and, grabbed her by the waist and kissed her lips, she kissed me back with the same love and sweetness. After our long, magical kiss we let go and enjoyed the rest of the song.

Little did I notice Sophie´s and Langdon´s shocked faces as they saw us kiss. And that then they just smiled and hi-fived each other with both hands, and Robert pulled her closer to him and kissed her lightly. After the song ended, it was the final song, they came over pushing everyone standing on their way (Sophie pretending she was a ninja). Mar started laughing and asked:"who are they?" "Well they´re some friends, well, actually it ´s a long story, she is the granddaughter of one of the people I murdered and he is the Harvard professor that helped her solve all the mystery and they ended up together." After a few moments of surprise she said "wow that is so weird!".

Just then, they approached us and Sophie yelled: "OMG, Silas! The last person in the world I was expecting to see like this, I want to meet her so bad!" I laughed and introduced them "well, Mar, Robert and Sophie". I immediately noticed chemistry between Sophie and Mar and had the feeling that they would become good friends. The whole place was so crowded and people were excited and desperate to get back home or to their hotels it took us hours to get out of all these mess. But eventually we did. We said goodbye to Robert and Sophie and we discovered that I had casually checked-in into the same hotel as her. I accompanied her to her room.

Well, good night. Sweet dreams.- I whispered.

You too.

And then she put her arms around my neck and gave me a long, deep kiss.

**Ok, so this is the happy ending so far. What do you think? Should i write more? Should they take their relationship to "the next level"? i would love to hear your opinion, so please review!**


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